uk Sexual violence & highly sensitive situations

What to do if…
an ex keeps sending unwanted sexual messages from new accounts after you have blocked them

Produced and maintained by PanicStation.org Published: 29 April 2026 Last reviewed: 17 July 2026 Editorial policy UK guide

Short answer

Do not reply. If you feel in immediate danger, call 999; otherwise move into a simple loop of saving a minimal record, blocking, reporting, tightening access, and getting specialist support.

Do not do these things

Don’t reply to argue, explain, insult them, or ask again for space; any reply may encourage more contact.
Don’t negotiate boundaries in chat if you have already made clear that contact is unwanted.
Don’t publicly post call-outs or evidence threads while this is still happening; it can escalate things or expose your information.
Don’t delete everything in a panic if you may want help later; save a minimal record first if it is safe.
Don’t assume it is not serious because it is online. Repeated unwanted sexual contact may amount to stalking or harassment, especially if it makes you feel scared, distressed or threatened.
Don’t change passwords or security settings on a device you think they may be able to access; use a safer device or account session first.

What to do now

Reduce exposure for the next few minutes.
Put your phone on Do Not Disturb, mute message requests where you can, and step away from the app long enough to make a calm next move.
Use one rule: no contact.
From now on, do not respond to any account you believe is them. If you have already said not to contact you, you do not need to repeat it.
Save a small record if it is safe to do so.
Keep only what is needed to show the pattern: screenshots with the account name, message, date and time, plus any profile link or handle. Put them in one folder or note, then stop collecting.
Block and report each new account.
Report the messages as harassment, stalking, sexual harassment or unwanted sexual content, depending on the platform wording. If the platform offers an option to block future accounts they may create, use it.
Tighten the routes they are using to reach you.
Change who can message you, comment, tag you, see your stories, or see your online status. Turn off “find me by phone number” or “find me by email” where possible. If they keep finding you, consider temporarily changing your username, display name, profile photo, or public profile details.
Secure the accounts they may know about.
Change passwords from a safer device if needed, turn on two-step verification, remove unknown logged-in devices, and check recovery email addresses and phone numbers. Start with the account they are using to contact you most.
Contact police if there is danger, threat, fear, or escalation.
Call 999 if you are in immediate danger, if they are threatening violence, or if you believe they are coming to where you are. If it is not an emergency, call 101 or use your local force’s online reporting route and say: “I blocked them, they keep creating new accounts, the messages are sexual and unwanted, and I have dates and screenshots.”
If you are under 18, involve a safer adult or child-focused support.
You do not have to handle sexual messages from an ex by yourself. If you can, tell a trusted adult, school safeguarding lead, youth worker or Childline what is happening.
Get specialist support without waiting for it to get worse.
The National Stalking Helpline can help with stalking and repeated unwanted contact. The Survivors Trust helpline can support people aged 16+ affected by sexual abuse or sexual violence. You do not have to know the perfect label for what is happening before asking for help.
Tell one trusted person the practical version.
Say something simple, such as: “My ex keeps contacting me from new accounts with sexual messages. Can you sit with me while I block and report them, or help me keep dates in one note?”

What can wait

You do not have to decide today whether to report formally, seek a protective order, or make a full statement.
You do not have to organise every message or prove the whole history right now.
You do not have to confront them, explain yourself, or persuade anyone that the messages are unwanted.
You do not have to change your whole online life tonight; focus first on stopping the routes they are using now.
You do not have to name this as stalking, harassment, abuse, or anything else before getting support.

Important reassurance

Feeling panicky, frozen, ashamed, angry, or disgusted is a common response to repeated unwanted sexual contact. This is not caused by you blocking them, not replying, or having had a relationship with them before. Small, repeatable steps are enough for now.

Scope note

These are first steps only, aimed at reducing exposure, preserving your choices, and buying time. If the contact continues or escalates, a specialist stalking, sexual violence, domestic abuse, legal, child support, cybersecurity, or police service may help you plan safer next steps.

Important note

This is general information, not legal, medical, therapeutic, cybersecurity, or other professional advice. If you feel in immediate danger, call 999. If you are worried they can access your device or accounts, use a safer device or account session before changing settings or contacting support.

Additional Resources

About this guide

This guide was produced and is maintained by PanicStation.org using its published editorial process. Official and specialist sources are checked where relevant, and AI-assisted tools may be used for drafting, organisation, and consistency checks. The site operator remains responsible for publication, revision, and removal decisions.

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